Intimacy can be hard in a long-term relationship. It’s not always easy to create new and exciting ways to mix things up and stay intimate with your partner.

How Are Couples Able to Find Intimacy?

Trying new things is one way to keep intimacy alive in your relationship. For example, you could cook a new dish together or learn what each of your favorite songs is.

Just the act of doing something new can renew that spark that you once had when you first met and fell in love with someone.

It’s easy for couples to develop a routine and take one another for granted.

Here are a few ways to make your relationship more intimate

Truly Listen and Understand Their Needs

What’s the difference between listening and truly listening?

The minute you become so caught up in your own thoughts and ideas that you can’t really hear what your partner is saying or thinking, it’s time for you to step back and take a minute to really listen.

When a person is truly listening, they are considering what their partner is saying, not just responding with a general “Oh, yeah?”

If you do this regularly, your partner will appreciate it. They will feel like they are being heard and understood.

Be Considerate of Their Feelings

Everyone has feelings and it’s the job of a good partner to discuss them.

Feelings don’t have to be deep, either. Make sure you discuss your intimate feelings too! Discussing fantasies, like introducing toys into the bedroom, for example, Wetforher.com has a great selection that can help to break the ice and build up the intimacy between you both.

Begin With an Apology if Needed

It’s important to make the first step towards improving your relationship and acknowledging any wrongdoings or miscommunication.

Try to get into a healthy dialogue about what happened, don’t hold back and feel like you need to apologize for everything. Just be aware of what exactly went wrong and how you could have behaved differently.

Try New Things Together That Are Passionate for Both of You

Set aside time each day when you are together to talk, touch, and get to know each other on a deeper level. Try new things that one of you would like to try and set the scene for the next time you see each other.

Start with small things like holding hands or kissing when you greet each other at the end of the day, then go into new territory later down the line if that excites you both.

Invite Them for a Date Night!

This is a fun way to spend some alone time with your partner while still being able to spend quality time together.

Encourage one another to get out and make an effort to dress up, try new restaurants, or even buy tickets to an upcoming concert or show.

Taking the time out of a busy social calendar will help you reconnect and open up to one another in a new way that you could not have done at home.

Russians are generally reserved individuals. They wouldn’t smile or pretend to be amused if they feel otherwise. Indeed, dating a Russian takes additional effort.

If you’re an American hoping to understand your Russian date, this article is for you. We talked about what it feels like to date a Russian local. We also included a few tips and pieces of advice you should take to heart to win your date’s attention and affection.

What Dating a Russian Local Feels Like

Below are the ultimate things to expect when dating a Russian local.

1. It would feel like dating with a supermodel

Men and women in Russia are very fashionable. However, contrary to rumors, Russian locals don’t spend their month’s salary on stylish fashion pieces.

Russian ladies look terrific with or without makeup. They are inherently beautiful and wouldn’t mind going out of the house looking unprepared. Men, too, are incredibly sexy. Their handsome faces plus their rich minds are enough to make a lady fall madly in love.

However, this doesn’t mean Russians don’t dress up at all — they still make sure they look their best on special occasions. Nonetheless, for Russian locals, good looks and a great attitude make for a perfect life partner.

2. Women won’t pay for dinner

In Russia, asking a woman to pay the bill or splitting it would be a gross insult. Russian women are used to being treated like real ladies, hoping for their dates and future partners to be absolute gentlemen. So, one way for you to show it to them is by paying for your dinner dates.

However, some Russian women would see it badly if you attempt to foot the dinner. To be safe, offer to pay the bill that time and assure her she could take the following date’s tab. This way, you wouldn’t hurt her feelings, and you — subtly — scored a subsequent date with her!

3. Men would be chivalrous

Chivalry never died in Russia. Going out on a date with a Russian guy would feel like dating a knight in the 21st-century era. On a date, it’s natural for Russian men to walk with you outside the sidewalk, open the door, or pull up the chair so you could sit comfortably and elegantly.

If you’re a guy trying to date a Russian lady, be sure to be the perfect gentleman. Treat her right and assure her she’d stay safe and loved with you.

4. Romantic gestures are normal

Russian men and women have a penchant for anything romantic. They welcome any display of passion and affection with warmth and excitement. They are even willing to express their love even when the relationship is still blooming.

This is way too different from Americans. Americans hold back and evaluate their care for their dates before saying those magical words. They believe that they should only say it to the right person at the right moment.

If there are some similarities between Russians and Americans, it would have to be their delight for flirting. Nonetheless, Russians prefer a chivalrous date who can sweep them off their feet.

5. A date’s venue won’t matter

When on a date with a Russian local, the venue does not matter. You could go out to a park or eat at a local diner, and it wouldn’t matter. For them, the company weighs more than any fancy dating place.

6. The first few dates might be a little dry at first

Russians are straightforward individuals. The saying, “What you want is what you get,” applies significantly to men and women in the country.

Russian singles don’t like to talk about nonsensical topics. They even hate small talk. Talking about societal matters would be a surefire way to capture your date’s attention.

A Russian local’s preference to steer clear from fluffy conversations might even result in their deep understanding of the world. With this, dating a Russian local would also mean getting someone with whom you could have profound discussions about life.

7. Friendly debates are natural

Like Americans, Russians are opinionated, too. They rarely hold back and constantly speak about what’s bothering them.

When dating a Russian local, expect them to give their two cents now and again. They will even challenge you to a friendly debate if your opinions clash.

Often, your Russian date might tell you what you need to hear, even when you wish contrarily. When this happens, never dismiss your date’s opinions. Instead, try to listen to them, keep an open mind, and offer your views as well.

8. Meeting their immediate and extended family

Russians hold high regard for their family and close relations. Although Americans are intimate with their family as well, nothing compares to how Russians value their family. Family is at the top of Russians’ priorities — some even follow their family’s opinions to a T.

Russia’s close family relations are traceable to Soviet communist rule, where everyone needed to tap each other for financial and emotional support. So, even up to this point, Russians have kept everyone close. Hence, when dating a Russian, trying to understand their family structure might be tricky.

In Russia, you will find out that the ones they call uncles, aunts, grandparents, or cousins might not be related to them by blood. Hence, it would be hard to know their actual relatives. And maybe, this is what makes them adorably unique.

9. Receive gifts constantly

No matter the occasion, Russians don’t visit friends or family unless they bring a gift.

On a date with a Russian single, don’t be shocked if they bring you a gift. Presents are a national staple in Russia. It’s inherent for them to give a gift even when someone isn’t close to them yet. Without a doubt, Russians are innately generous and appreciate the art of gift-giving.

10. They believe in superstitious beings or rituals

When Russia was in a deep economic crisis, Russian locals clung tightly to the mercy of higher beings. So much so that they built over 5,000 religious organizations.

With the varied religious groups, superstitious notions came to power. Some Russian locals even continued following such practices today. For example, looking at one’s reflection in front of a mirror may mean seven years’ worth of severe bad luck. Additionally, unmarried women should not sit at the corner of a table; otherwise, they will never marry.

If your date’s one of the many that still practice Russia’s old superstitions, be sure to respect their beliefs. While this may be funny to you, these beliefs are already part of their system. Hence, keep your feelings to yourself if you also want to keep them in your life.

11. Miscommunications might happen

Dating a Russian single can be challenging because of differences in culture and language.

If you wish to date a Russian local successfully, be sure to learn their language. While you do that, study your date’s culture. Clashes regarding tradition or customs are typical when it comes to cross-cultural relationships. The important thing is that you are willing to understand each other.

12. You get to see the world differently

To some, dating someone you don’t share the same culture and language with might mean trouble. But for the most part, being in an interethnic relationship means getting the chance to see the world a little better. You get to have your personal tour guide, and you get to understand their culture at a deeper level.

Love genuinely

Meeting your ideal mate from an extraordinary land like Russia and falling madly in love seems to be a dream come true. It is even the fantasy most of us see in movies or read in books.

If you’ve finally met your ideal date through a Russian local, don’t ever let them go. But also, don’t forget to bring along a bag load of patience, respect, and authenticity with you. Good luck, and be sure to have fun!

What Does “Going Out” Mean?

The phrase “going out” has been around for decades, but its meaning is still ambiguous. Depending on how old the couple is and their own boundaries, going out can mean literally going out or it can mean texting.

Going out in middle school was often done in preparation for a more mature relationship later on. Here, the beginning stages of dating often include other people. Friends and friends of friends have a significant role in how the couple communicates.

As we age, communication becomes increasingly important in all relationships. By voicing what you want and listening to the other person’s point of view, you both can grow together while maintaining mutual respect. There are several ways to effectively communicate and not all of them have to do with the conversation.

Effective ways of communication include:

• Physical affection
• Posture
• Gestures
• Eye contact
• Space
• Words

Going out usually involves a certain intensity of all these communication styles. Even if a couple isn’t physically going to a bar or to the movies, “going out” can be a symbol that the relationship is meaningful.

Labels: Are They Important?

Labels help people understand boundaries. In this sense, labels are very important. Unfortunately, labels can also become limiting.

Without labels, both individuals and groups may have trouble identifying themselves. If they cannot accurately identify what age range they are in, which profession they chose, and their level of involvement in relationships, it becomes difficult to understand the parameters.

Parameters in a relationship are usually there to protect feelings and signal to others that this is an exclusive relationship. Although that has been depicted as what most couples want, not everybody feels that way.

Friends With Benefits vs. Hook-Up Culture

The hook-up culture is not the same as the label “friends with benefits”. In the years of Sex and The City, hook-up culture was represented as an empowering way for women to get their needs met without necessarily subscribing to the status quo.

This sentiment was echoed throughout colleges and cities around the United States. The hook-up culture was largely seen as a positive interaction that involved a one-night stand. Messy relationships or breakfast were not required.

Friends with benefits is a term used to describe something a little less polarized. While it isn’t an exclusive relationship, it isn’t an alcohol-fueled one-night stand, either. It usually involves two people who already know each other that have sex on a somewhat regular basis.

Like hooking up, there is little commitment necessary. This allows both individuals to see and usually have sex with other people. Both hook-up culture and friends with benefits are ways to have a relationship (or not). I recommend getting on as many hookup sites and apps as possible. Peninsula Daily News article that covers the top 10 hookup apps that you should be on. Make sure you check that out as well.

The Pros of Friends With Benefits

1. Companionship

Friends with benefits are friends. You like them. They are fun to hang out with and talk to when you’re feeling lonely or bored. For those who do not enjoy being alone at night, this is a solution that can help but does not require much emotional investment in return.

2. Low Key

Low expectations are one of the perks of having a friend with benefits. They generally do not demand much time or emotional support. Many people enjoy this situation because it affords the freedom to flirt or have sex with other people. There is no need to feel guilty about missed anniversaries or birthdays. If you’re busy, this is can be an ideal relationship.

3. Confidence Boost

Somebody who wants to see you again can be a confidence booster for anyone. This is especially true when they desire you or find you attractive. A friends with benefits situation can help both people feel sexy and in control.

4. A Potential Date

A plus 1 is always nice to have for weddings or evening events. While not every friend with benefits will be available or want to join, they are still friends. The communication style is usually smooth since there is little at stake emotionally and can make for a relaxing time out with friends.

The Cons of Friends With Benefits

1. No Emotional Requirements

The emotional side of a friend with benefits may be slim to none. Since there are very few demands made of the other person, emotional support and deep connection are not necessarily there. Having someone to share feelings with is possible in this kind of relationship, but it can lead to feelings of jealousy.

2. Jealousy

Many people find it difficult to separate physical and emotional feelings once sex is involved. With a no-strings-attached relationship, it can be difficult knowing the other person is out with someone else. Unanswered calls or texts can feel increasingly hurtful if this is not communicated early on.

3. You Might Fall In Love

Falling in love with someone who is emotionally unavailable is a recipe for heartbreak. Since one person cannot change another, the situation can be futile. Falling in love can happen even if you limit time with the other person and it can be difficult to turn away from it once it happens.

4. Low Esteem

While one-night stands and friends with benefits may initially boost confidence, it can also have the ability to lower self-esteem. Long-term relationships where there is little commitment can hinder the ability to meet new people. While not everyone is like this, the toll that a non-committed relationship can take is real.

A Committed Relationship

Committed relationships look different depending on the couple. Commonly committed relationships can include marriage, but they also include other arrangements as well.

Committed relationships can take the form of dating or dating while living under the same roof. One of the advantages of a committed relationship is the emotional security of knowing you’re both on the same page.

A committed relationship does not necessarily mean an exclusive relationship. Commitment means dedication. Some couples may find themselves in committed relationships while having rules or boundaries about flings. As long as the parameters of a relationship are well communicated, any couple has a chance to figure out what works best for them.

There is no right or wrong way to have a relationship as long as both people are in agreement. Once this is accomplished, the dating process can begin. If one way of dating does not suit the couple, trying another is always an option.

Fortunately, employing some tried-and-true tips and tricks to make it through the most challenging phases of a break-up can help mend a broken heart and set you on a path forward.

In need of some ideas on how to make it through the darker post-break-up days and forward on an upward trajectory? Then keep reading to learn three hints, tips and strategies to come out happy on the other side.

1. Give Yourself Time to Grieve and Mourn

Drawing the distinction between grief and mourning can be explained via the following: “Grief and mourning are common terms to describe feelings and behaviors following a loss. Although sometimes used interchangeably, grief and mourning represent different parts of loss.”

In other words, if you love someone but had to part ways, no matter whose choice or the reason, it’s still a loss that you must allow yourself to feel and move on from on your own terms. Hopefully, you won’t need to stay in this place long, but take some time for yourself.

When your friends start to prod you to leave the house in your cutest outfits, it’s likely time to snap out of it. Until then, do what you need to get those bad feelings out of your system.

2. Start to Let Go

After giving yourself the time and space needed to get over the break-up, moving on and letting go when the time is right is quintessential to feeling your best. In fact, experts recommend you stop ruminating over what went wrong and put an end to placing blame on yourself or your ex-partner. Instead, try getting out of your head and being subsumed by negative thought patterns by taking a yoga class, seeing a therapist, volunteering a few hours a week, or striking up a new hobby like gardening or learning a musical instrument.

3. Treat Yourself to New Intimates

As you start to feel more like your fun-loving, lighthearted and confident self again — or if you need some help getting there — treat yourself to some new delicate and sexy garters and intimates. You certainly won’t be alone in doing so. In fact, more and more women these days turn to lingerie to boost their happiness and sense of empowerment.

Whether you’re ready to start looking for a new love or want to spend more time focusing on yourself, there’s a place in your closet and on your body for beautiful lingerie. Indeed, you’ll love how great you look and feel, as the right intimate wear accentuates all your best attributes. And there is still love out there for people over 50 – look into Ourtime to get back into the swing of things. You can even hire a male escort for women, they’re trained professionals and make awesome companions overall.

Be Kind to Yourself, and You’ll Bounce Back in No Time

Each of these tips has one thing in common: self-kindness. And we’ll say it again and again: You need to give yourself time to heal in order to get back out there on your own terms. To do so, you’ll not only need to be more introspective but also develop a strategy of self-forgiveness, allowing you to push yourself to get back out into the dating world — in a way that makes you feel great about yourself, both inside and out.

Why does a man need to “build” attraction?

As men primarily experience attraction visually, you’ll probably know whether you want to be with a woman within seconds. That’s not how it works with women though.

Women primarily experience attraction emotionally. They usually get turned on by a man’s behavior more than his appearance. So, if you’re not behaving in an attractive way, a woman won’t be around you or even to date you again.

10 Tips To Build Attraction With A Woman On A First Date

Essentially, attraction-building is the process of showing off qualities that women find attractive. Here are 10 things you can do on a first date that will make a woman more attracted to you.

1. Lead

Being able to lead is a highly masculine quality. Women don’t want to have to lead on the first date at all. It’s a huge turn-off for them.

They want to date a leader So, make sure you’re the one to choose the location, plan what you’re doing, decide when to go to the next venue, etc. This decisiveness is crucial to building attraction.

2. Flirt

Flirting isn’t just about complimenting her. It’s a dance. You need to leave some mystery. A bit of push and pull.

Women don’t want to know that you’re completely sold on them, not during the first date anyway. They’d prefer if you seemed a bit unsure about them. This creates the space for them to chase you.

So, be subtle and sparing with your compliments. Do enough for them to see you have the balls to pull the trigger, but not so much that it kills all the mystery.

3. Tease

Teasing is a great flirting technique because it creates that space for her to chase your rapport. It shows you’re not desperate for her affection. Also, it demonstrates that you’re comfortable around her. After all, best friends tease each other all the time. Strangers are too scared to do it.

4. Touch

Women go just as wild for physical touch as men do. The difference is: you’ll need to build it up slowly with a woman. Perhaps you start with friendly pats on the arm, hugs, holding hands, etc. If she’s comfortable with that, then you can progress to more risque moves.

5. Tell high-value stories

If you have any stories about yourself that demonstrate attractive qualities, tell them! However, if it seems like you’re telling the story just to impress her, it can appear as if you’re trying too hard. That can be a huge turn-off. So, only tell the stories if they come up naturally in the conversation and be subtle with your boasting.

6. Show social proof

If you can demonstrate popularity and social competency in front of your date, take the opportunity to do so. That’s more proof that you’re a fun cool guy to be around. You’re not just faking it for her.

If you can vibe well with the barman or the waitress, that’s great. If you already know a bunch of people in the venue, that’s even better.

7. Discuss flirty topics

Most men and women enjoy asking each other fun flirty questions with people they trust not to judge them. If you can initiate these sorts of topics without any shame or embarrassment in your voice, that shows you won’t judge her for being sexual either.

Be careful not to overdo it though. Don’t be crude. Just like when you’re touching her, pay attention to her reaction and calibrate accordingly.

8. Express yourself shamelessly and passionately

When a man is nervous or feels like he’s not good enough for a woman, he begins to filter himself. He also blocks himself from communicating with full passion. She will sense this. And, needless to say, a woman doesn’t want a man who feels as if he’s below her.

When you express yourself passionately without filters, this shows that you’re comfortable in her presence. You feel you deserve her. You’re not worried about her opinion of you. This is incredibly attractive.

9. Make her laugh

A good sense of humor is one of the most important qualities that women look for in a man. If you can make her laugh, she’ll have a good time and will want to see you more. What’s more, it helps her relax. When she’s relaxed, she’ll be more open to experiencing feelings of arousal.

10. Look at the part

When you dress well and you’re well-groomed, it signals that you have self-respect. Expensive or classy clothes can signal wealth and success, which are also attractive qualities. If you look scruffy, that’s a clear sign you can’t look after yourself and don’t have your life together.

Don’t forget to build comfort as well…

It’s not enough to just build attraction on a first date. To make your relationship to the next level, you also need to make a woman comfortable in your presence.

She needs to be able to trust you and feel like she knows you well. You can build this comfort by telling personal stories about yourself, listening to hers, and showing that you actually care about her as a person.

Honestly, men tend to do this pretty well on a first date, but most struggle to build attraction on top of it. The tips in this article will prove to be the missing piece of the puzzle for most guys.

By following them, you’ll be more likely to see your first dates progress into second, third, and fourth dates, and maybe even into full-blown relationships.

Best of luck out there!

All important relationships take time and effort. You have to be heard and truly listen in order to make progress. With digital communication readily available, people often resort to the quickest and easiest communication method. However, elements of an effective conversation including listening, noticing body language, and building a foundation of trust. If you find that you are struggling to listen or be heard, you may need to reevaluate your communication habits. These five communication tips listed below provide detailed methods on how to better connect with your loved ones.

1. Practice Reflective Listening

How often do we hear without actually listening? We begin to give generic answers as our thoughts wander. Practicing reflective listening can help us refocus our attention in a conversation.

The objective of reflective listening is to discover and relay the message back to the speaker. The speaker can then confirm if the message was correctly received and continue to build upon that topic. Reflective listening can help you come to a shared understanding and resolve difficult conflicts.

An example may be listening to your partner say, “Work continues to pile up, and it doesn’t seem like my boss notices. I can’t continue to work under this pressure.” You may respond by saying, “It sounds like you are putting forth your best effort at work, but the workload is unmanageable. You feel that your efforts are going unnoticed further adding to the dissatisfaction.”

Some reflective listening phrases include 

• “Tell me more about…”
• “I didn’t realize you felt…”
• “Thank you for sharing about…”
• “Let me see if I understand what you are saying…”
• “If I understand correctly, you feel that…”

When you practice reflective listening, you stay better engaged in the conversation. You will be more up-to-date about what’s going on in your loved one’s life. Your loved one will also continue to share vulnerable thoughts and feelings with you.

2. Make the Conversation “Safe”

Difficult conversations need thoughtful preparation. Everyone is subject to their own biases and assumptions. Approaching conversations without preconceived notions will help us find the truth and encourage productive dialogue.

Making a conversation “safe” means that both people can share their thoughts and feelings openly without being verbally attacked or needing to withdraw. In the book, Crucial Conversations, the author discusses some of the telltale signs that someone feels unsafe.

During an unsafe conversation, a loved one may resort to violence such as name-calling, belittling, controlling, speaking in absolutes, etc. An individual may also move to silence by withholding information or withdrawing from the conversation.

Start a conversation by stating the facts, and be open to new information and ideas. Being able to work through difficult conversations without resorting to violence or silence will produce quality dialogue.

3. Use Rich Communication Channels

The digital world provides several methods of communication. We can now send videos and text messages throughout the day. Cellular communication channels enable us to meet new people and build relationships when we are not physically together.

For example, online dating has allowed many singles to meet and match during pandemic lockdowns. Online daters often start with leaner communication methods such as emails and instant messages. But as the relationship progresses, the couple may try video calls, phone calls, and in-person dates to grow the relationship. These are considered rich communication channels.

The best communication methods allow you to communicate using verbal and nonverbal cues. If you are talking with a loved one face-to-face, you can tell if he or she feels comfortable by the way they are positioning themselves. Are their arms folded and knees crossed facing away from you? These nonverbal cues can guide your response and deepen the emotional connection.

Face-to-face and verbal communication also lead to fewer misunderstandings. You can make sure that your message is being understood when you take the time to communicate through rich channels.

4. Set Clear and Realistic Expectations

Realistic expectations and clear boundaries are essential to a healthy relationship. Fair expectations help both people take responsibility for their actions. For example, you may decide to split up household duties such as washing the dishes, taking out the trash, and paying the bills. You may also discuss your personal need for space to recharge or reconnect with others.

A helpful exercise is to sit down with your partner or loved one and list your values. Learn about their love languages, personal interests, and routine habits. You can then create weekly goals together to help quantify and measure your expectations.

Communicate often about expectations because they can change as your relationship progresses. With clear communication, you will discover that you are more understanding when a conflict does arise.

5. Schedule Time to Communicate

If you want your relationship to improve, you need to put in consistent effort. That means scheduling time to go on a date, hang out, talk on the phone, etc. Just waiting until the opportunity presents itself may prolong critical conversations.

One idea is to set aside time with your spouse to discuss your daily events during dinner or before your nightly routine. You can also specify one evening to spend time together each week with undivided attention. Get creative with the topics you discuss as you learn more about your loved one. Consistent and effective communication will strengthen your understanding of one another.

Give these five communication tips a try by first noticing how you communicate and what areas you could improve in. You may find that it takes time to build effective communication habits. Have patience for yourself and your loved ones. You will see noticeable improvement when you both commit to living these tips despite conflicting schedules or outside resistance. In the end, the time and effort to build these habits is worth it for those seeking a happy, healthy, and long-lasting relationship.

It can be difficult to know how to tell a guy you are not interested in him in a way that is clear but does not hurt his feelings. However, it is certainly possible to strike this balance! In this guide, we will look at some of the different things you should keep in mind when dealing with this challenge.

1. Choose the right time

Choosing the right time to tell him your feelings (or lack of feelings) is important. You should let him know as soon as possible in order to avoid confusion or false hope. It is only fair to be upfront and honest about how you feel.

However, some situations are not ideal for this conversation. If he is a work colleague or classmate, try and avoid times such as in the middle of a shift or class. Choosing a time such as the end of the day can be the best way for him to process this without it disrupting the day for either of you or anyone else.

2. Use the right method of communication

If he texts you every day, you can probably simply tell him that you are not interested over text (or instant message). This has the advantage of being relatively simple, and you will have time to compose a text rather than being put on the spot.

If you have already been on dates with him and something has started to develop, it may be better to tell him face-to-face. This can be in a public place, but you should not draw attention to it or embarrass him in front of others. If a middle ground between a simple text and a face-to-face meeting is best, why not try a phone call?

3. Be clear and direct

Perhaps you went on a date or two with him before realizing that you weren’t interested in pursuing the relationship further. If this is the case, you should make it clear that you do not want to continue to date him. Do not arrange or agree to hang out with him unless he is sure that you mean it in a purely platonic way and you are both comfortable with this.

You may be surprised at how bad guys can be at taking hints. Sometimes, guys need to know directly that they do not have a chance, otherwise, they will continue to try!

4. Be kind, not cruel

Being direct is important, but this does not mean being rude or cruel. You do not have to point out all of the things that you find unattractive about him or say anything else that is insulting or offensive to him personally. If he has done nothing wrong to you, you do not need to do anything other than politely let him know that you are not interested in him in that way.

If he is rude or disrespectful to you, either when pursuing you (for example if he sent you unsolicited sexual messages or made offensive remarks) or after receiving your rejection, you can probably be blunter and not worry so much about preserving his ego. However, if you have been direct in your rejection, it may be best to simply block his number and cut contact in general.

5. Make sure he respects your decision

We are all allowed to change our minds about things, including about who we are interested in romantically. These feelings often change over time, and it is common to develop feelings over time for people who we were not interested in at first. On the other hand, it is also common to lose interest in people that we were attracted to at first. You may change your mind about him in time, but this is your own decision and cannot be forced.

If he pesters you or constantly tries to change your mind, this is not respectful of your boundaries. A guy who does not respect you at this stage would probably not respect you in a relationship either. He may hope that you change your mind, and he is allowed to, but he should always respect your decision and treat it as if it is final.

1. Go easy with your expectations

Maybe you’ll meet that someone at the very first beginning of your online dating story, and maybe you’ll need days, weeks, or even months to find your date. Whatever the situation, it’s important to know that, when it comes to online dating, it’s best to go easy with your expectations. Of course, having standards is a different thing altogether, and that’s totally fine, but if you’re new to the world of online dating, then leave your (unrealistic) expectations at the front door.

2. Accept online dating as it is

Online dating is awkward in general, so there’s no need to constantly pretend you’re this super cool person who has everything figured out. Also, since real-life dating is awkward then that means that online dating is also strange and bizarre at times. So, accept that before you start feeling disappointed.

3. Don’t invest too much if you don’t want to meet in person

Texting back and forth and enjoying online conversations can be fun and pleasant, but there’s no point in it if you don’t plan to meet in person. Also, if you plan to meet for the first time, limiting the amount of interaction will make sure you have something to talk about. Some people prefer to list everything about them in their app’s bios, and sometimes that can take away all the magic. Keeping things a bit mysterious (without being evasive, when asked questions) will make you more enticing. Discussing every single topic before the first meeting can make the magic go away.

4. Find a dating service that works for you

There are so many dating apps, so you don’t need to stick to only one. Tinder is a well-known one, but there is also Bumble and plenty of others that you might try. Remember that dating in the digital age can be fun if you find a dating service or an app that fits your preferences. Nowadays, you can find a dating app that fits your political and religious preferences, which can definitely make things a lot easier. That can be of great help especially if politics, religion, and family status matter to you a lot.

5. Get ready to be dumped

This might seem a bit harsh, but sadly, that’s one of the realities of online dating. Getting left and forgotten after a date, also known as ghosting, is something to be prepared for. Also, maybe you’ll also be the one who ghosts sometimes. That’s the normal part of dating online, so if it happens to you, it would be best to move on and look for someone else who will treat you better.

Conclusion

Thanks to online dating, many people found their happily ever after. However, if settling down is your ultimate goal, get ready for some trial-and-error before you meet that special someone. Therefore, keep your expectations realistic, and don’t get too disappointed if your date doesn’t meet your expectations. Remember that online dating should be fun and playful so don’t waste too much time feeling bad, instead, try to enjoy yourself and you’ll meet your special person.

1. Discuss Values

A very important part of establishing any successful relationship is to truly delve into what is of value to the both of you. It’s important to lay everything out on the table because what you may believe is a universal value, may be less important to your partner. While these topics shouldn’t be brought up on the first date, they are important to include in the casualty of dating as they don’t hold either partner to any unrealistic expectations. However, if you wait until marriage to explore each others’ values, you run the risk of you or your partner feeling unfulfilled or disappointed in the difference in expectations. To help you get started, here are some common topics to think about:

• Where will you live once you are married?
• Do you prefer rural, suburban, or city living?
• Will you live in an apartment or a home?
• How will you navigate the holidays? Will you visit both families or one family every other year?
• How do you feel about your partner maintaining friendships with people of the opposite sex?
• What roles do you plan to take on within the marriage? (Cleaning, cooking, finances, etc.)
• Will you have children? If so, how many and how soon?
• What type of parenting styles do you plan to take on?

These are only a few of the many questions you and your partner can discuss, however, they are great starting points to get you both on the same page.

2. Set Goals

Once you have gone over some topics you consider to be important, you should always set goals keeping you and your partners’ values in mind. For example, if you are planning to move once the two of you are married, it’s a good idea to set a date or time period in which you’d like to move. You can utilize a goal planner to create small, achievable goals on a regular basis that will ultimately help you to move into your dream home at the right time. Not only does planning ahead of time help establish some structure to achieve your goals, but it inspires true partnership within your relationship to work together toward each one.

3. Talk About Money

Adjusting to marriage can be challenging for anyone. However, with proper planning of finances, you’ve already defeated half the battle. As newlyweds, you will likely be venturing into new territory when it comes to joint finances; making it so important to discuss your ideas and plans for the future ahead of time.

You can start by hashing out how your accounts will be handled and your thoughts on distributing income between the two of you. If you both have decided on investing in something as large as a house, you should begin to plan out what you can afford in a house now, in order to give you both a greater chance at financial freedom in the future. You may want to start by bringing up the topic of money during casual moments of conversation as it can be a difficult talk to have. However, over time, you will likely get a feel for how you and your partner plan to handle finances and once marriage is officially on the table, you can discuss it further in more detail.

4. Spend Time with Family

It’s important that during your dating relationship, you become familiar with the important people in your partner’s life as well. Any friends, family, and loved ones they consider to be a major part of their life, you should make the point of getting to know them. Not only will this encourage a great relationship between you and their friend or family member, but it will also show your partner how much you value the important people in their life as well. If you are at a gathering with all of their loved ones, take the initiative and introduce yourself first. If all goes well, you can offer up the opportunity for you and that friend to meet personally, in a smaller setting. This way, you can get to know each other one-on-one and develop your own relationship with them. In the end, this will help to encourage your partner to pursue marriage with you — especially now that they added support and encouragement from the important people in their life.

5. Intentionally Date Each Other

For many couples, the first few months of a relationship are still filled with love and joy all around. However, the more each of you settle back into your daily routines and become accustomed to the relationship, the easier it is to lose sight of the value you hold in each others’ lives. So, to help keep the spark alive now and practice a great habit to continue into marriage, you should intentionally date one another. Yes, I say “intentionally” because the dating aspect of many relationships can sometimes fall to the wayside. However, if you both make the point of scheduling date nights, saving up for them, and putting on your best outfit, you’ll be in the habit of going through extra lengths to get to know your partner on a deeper level.

Keep in mind that your dates don’t always have to be sit-down dinner. Explore different activities each of you enjoy, like a golfing date, spa date, or a morning hike on your favorite trail. The idea is to spend time with eachother alone and get to know each other better and better each time. Ultimately, it will help you both to commit emotionally to marriage as you will both feel more connected to each other than ever before.

6. Seek Advice

Lastly, before getting married, you should always seek advice from others to help set the two of you up for success in the future. Most likely, you and your partner will have already spoken with your close friends or parents about the possibility of marriage. However, you should make the point of meeting with a mentor couple as well. Typically, this is a couple who has been married for a number of years and whose goals, values, and marriage styles align with those you and your partner wish to have. Keep in mind that this mentor couple may not necessarily be direct friends or family members of yours. Instead, they may be community leaders or neighbors you’ve always looked up to for the success of their relationship. However even if you don’t feel that a mentor couple is the right fit for the two of you, you should still refer to any examples of marriage you see in your own life and ask for their tips and advice for the future.

After giving each of these tips a try, your relationship will certainly be ready for marriage. Continue to do your own research and discuss with your partner the ways that you both can prepare yourselves for a lifetime together. While it may seem like extra work to develop a plan and try new strategies, the powerful marriage that you can create as a result is more than worth it in the end. Before you know it, your relationship will reach the next level and someone will be ready to propose. Good luck!

At-home food tour

If you’ve ever wanted to go on a food tour in your city but can’t ever seem to find the time, here’s your chance to do it at home. Whether it’s a new restaurant that just opened, a swanky restaurant that you’ve had your eye on, or tapas from a popular bar, you can plan on takeout for the next three or four days if you call ahead to check on the restaurant’s availability. Pair it with your favorite bottle of wine or make your favorite cocktails together and have not one, but a few romantic dinners at home with some new eats.

Dinner and a movie under the stars

For something more intimate, an activity like making dinner together over the weekend can put a twist on your everyday routine. Having a friendly competition for making the best personalized pizza, or making the entree to complement the side dishes can stir some playful conversation and moments. Dining al fresco with a special table set up outdoors will take any simple dinner to the next level and revive any boring patio furniture. Table linens from August Table, candle votives, floral arrangements, and special flatware may be a fun way to do something different.

After dinner, you can set up your outdoor projector and enjoy a movie under the stars. It may even be better than the drive-in.

Book a staycation

If you’re itching to go out but don’t want to be near crowds, booking a staycation at a resort a couple hours from home may be a safer way to travel while still getting away. Whether it’s up in the mountains, hidden in the canyon somewhere, or sitting on a beach, a staycation may give you all the vacation feels without worrying about social distancing on a plane or other forms of public transportation. Once there, you can enjoy the on-site amenities together such as a couples massage, breakfast in bed brought to you by room service, or enjoying the nearby surroundings. If you both enjoy the outdoors, make sure you pack some hiking gear to hit a nearby trail. Packing a breakfast or lunch in reliable bags from places like Jack Wolfskin may be a fun idea to take with you so that the two of you can have a picnic by a waterfall or overlooking the city.

The best way to execute a romantic weekend is to plan ahead and make sure you are both on the same page. That way, you already know what’s on the itinerary and can make sure to block out that time for each other.